I Want A Comfy Chair, damn it!

“Mom, here’s the thing I don’t understand about school…how come only the teachers get the comfy chairs? I think I would learn a lot better if I had a comfy chair, too.”    Jay-8

I think the kid’s got a point. Right this very second, I am sitting in an extremely uncomfortable chair and I can’t think of a single witty thing to write. I’ve got nothing. Maybe this comfy chair theory should be tested. Here’s what I propose…

1) All students should have a comfy chair. No more uncomfortable, wooden, straight-backed chairs. I want plush, cushy, comfy chairs in all the classrooms.

2) The green vinyl seating on all school buses should be replaced with high-quality, genuine leather, reclining seats.    

3) Cafeteria benches should be covered in plush cushions, preferably made with polyester fabric for easy clean-up.

4) All toilet seats should be replaced with state-of-the-art, padded, anti-bacterial seats with optional heating controls.

5) Auditorium seating should be updated to meet current chiropractic standards. Movie theater style seats made of memory foam, including lumbar support, should be considered.

This may be the key to increased performance on state standardized testing, better behavior, longer attention spans, higher GPA’s and increased college-acceptance rates.

Let me ask you, are you sitting in a comfy chair?